Thursday, August 1, 2019

Verily, Me

I didn't want to write again – no matter what they'll think it's about you
I suppose I won't fight or prolong it, and simply write what is true:

You took me on an emotional roller coaster – it all went so fast
I remember every smile you ever gave me, from the first to the last
I liked to hear you ramble – I liked it when you talked
I liked that you made sure to be closer to the road when we walked
You made me laugh, and blush, and cry
You said you loved everything about me, and I wondered why
If goodbye was inevitable, it's best to do it quickly, I thought
But I'm not sad about the time we had together – I'm sad about the time we will not . . .

I'm smart – I knew we wouldn't last – knew it would lead to no good
But I'm silly and childish – I wanted to keep you as long as I could . . .
I want to say there are no hard feelings, but what I'm feeling is hard
But time will heal, and we didn't know each other long enough to get scarred
But until that time . . . does your heart ache when you see me?
Do you flip-flop between being completely fine and crying suddenly?
There is an empty yet tight feeling in my chest, like someone squeezed my heart down a size or two
And I know there's no point, but I keep torturing myself with thoughts of you . . .

Don't fret – I work through feelings quickly – I'll be over you soon enough
It's just these last few days have been tough . . .
I'd like to think it's your loss – because I'm just that amazingly perfect, you know
But you are pretty amazing yourself, and I'm sorry you had to go
Because I'm me and must view every painful moment as an opportunity for growth and success -
I thank you for being such a gentleman, as now I'll never accept anything less
I'm glad to have known you – I don't regret it at all
I'll learn from this roller coaster, from every rise and every fall

Now I'll end with an inside joke, the meaning of which I'll never tell:
At least Victor Alan doesn't think I'm going to hell

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