Ashes

Just trying to find some normalcy
Just trying to recognize these eyes
These harsh tones and sharp words
Cut until happiness dies

I'll be the sealed lips in the corner
Wearing a brave face and a hoodie
Like a child's safety blanket
Wrapped twice around me

Isolated as I am
With frost covered lashes
I know this isn't about me
But I'm crumbling to ashes

When has it ever been?
Never caused a moments worry
Bitten nails and tongues
The words become blurry

These things are true but I'm a liar
How are you to know?
Can't you read me like these words?
Fooled so long by my show

Trying to get a grip
You turn to smoke before my eyes
Grasping at air
Turning to ash as the fire dies

I need someone to hold me
But I flinch at your touch
I need you to hear me
But I don't talk much

I'm just crumbling now
I'll put myself back together soon
You have more important things to worry about
And I want to be a boon

But I listen to music when I'm upset
And lately I've heard too many songs
And I feel so helpless
Unable to right these wrongs

Can't you be the firm hand on my shoulder?
Raising me up when I fall down?
Can't you say you're proud of me?
Giving you no reason to frown

Because I don't want this to be normal anymore
But you don't recognize my eyes
And I've always managed without you
So like a lonesome phoenix, watch me rise