Sunday, November 6, 2016

Blind Wisdom

I'm no natural
None of this comes easy
I'm no perfect girl
That's just not me
You think my words flow
So simply from my mind
You think I find it easy
To obey the rules, blind

But you aren't here for my struggles
You don't see when things go wrong
You don't notice
When my morality isn't strong
You don't understand
The tornado inside
You don't realize
All the times I have lied

It isn't real
These things that I write
You think they're me
But they're not quite
I try to find myself in these words
But I'm never completely there
The words hide me
The sentences tear

It's all a lie, you know
That is what I do
But my lies are so pretty
That even I think they're true
Trying to sort out
The truths from the lies
Is impossible
For each word denies

Can you help me understand?
Tell me, am I false?
Is everything about me a lie?
Do I even truly have a pulse?
None of it makes sense
None of it rings true
Up is down
Red is blue

And it all just keeps going
None of it ever ends
The bold cry in silence
While the coward defends
The honest lie
The sad smile
I pour out my heart
And I'm lying all the while

Complete honesty?
No; I must save face
Blunt the sword
Poison the lace
Beautify the ugly
And damage the good
I don't know how to stop
But would I, if I could?

For these words
With beauty and grace
Make people feel
And think to question the lace
Is it so bad
To fictionalize my soul?
To make everything lovely
Or more horrid than coal?

Is it so bad
To want to paint myself a thing of wisdom?
Is it so bad
To want to build myself a protective kingdom?
Answer me honestly
Tell me what you think
For I am not a thing of wisdom
And I need someone to make my list of questions shrink

So what do you say?
What is the answer?
Do tell me if you know
But only if you're sure

3 comments:

  1. You're such a good writer Celora! Sorry I haven't been online recently but I am back for the long run now. :P I think you get really deep in these poems but it is also a lovely way to show your emotions. Writing can be very powerful and shocking.
    "For these words
    With beauty and grace
    Make people feel
    And think to question the lace
    Is it so bad
    To fictionalize my soul?
    To make everything lovely
    Or more horrid than coal?"
    So true. I can relate so much to this!
    I hope you have a fantastic day, speak to you soon! :)
    Lauren xx

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    Replies
    1. Thanks so much, Lauren! I'm glad you liked it and can relate :) And Happy Birthday!

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  2. I'm running out of wisdom I’m running out of time I’m running into trouble I dare not look behind I'm hiding from my sorrows I'm hiding from my glee I cannot live my heart will stop if it catches me it bites upon my ankles it swallows up my feet it lunges at my heart with fangs and then begins to eat my heart is turned to ashes there is acid in my blood I’m turning into darkness the beast I have become.
    -jamesparksisdead

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