Static

I'll try to make you understand
With words so emphatic
I'll try to think coherently
But my head is full of static

White noise surrounds me
Static fills my bones
The ghost of electricity
Howls between these unknowns

It's all a bit deafening
It's all a bit much
For me to handle today
Drowning in thoughts and such

I could learn to swim
Only, inertia rules these halls
Apathy occupies the rooms
Memories rattle inside the walls

How could they not?
This is the abode
Of past selves and their mistakes
All set to implode

They seep in through my ears
And in through my eyes
Wrap me in sleepless nights
And empty skies


I can't make you understand
Truth is so varied and problematic
I'll try to move forward
But everything is static

Frozen eyes stare down at me
Inertia holds my frame
Thoughts swirl around me
Yet everything remains the same

It's all a bit sickening
It's all a bit dead
With the knowledge that one day
It'll just be another thing someone said

I could try to forget
That death shrouds it all
That time fades away
The ghosts in my wall

But how could I succeed?
This is our curse
To craft our lives and selves
Knowing it will all someday disperse

To worry and fret
Over stillness, mistakes, and lies
For such a short time
Until we return to the skies


I'll never fully understand
A life so motionless yet erratic
I'll try to be coherent for now
Though my words are filled with static 

Heartbeat

I heard your heart beating

Hugging you so tight

Ear pressed against your chest

Arms around me - it felt so right

Right now, I'm missing you

Don't really want to anymore

Yet, neither do I want to forget

Only, what was it all for?

Understand so little these days

Really, I've lost my head

Head - no, more my heart

Enthralled with everything you ever said

And I'd like it back, if you could

Really, I must protest

To you keeping it so long

Because, now, it belongs in my chest

Endings hurt like nothing else

And we've played them on repeat

Though it feels harsh -

I need this final end to be complete 

Not that it even really helps -

God knows, I still miss your heartbeat

Valediction

I'm trying to understand
All my racing thoughts
Make them into something coherent
Straighten out all the knots

Only, emotions get in the way
Racing hearts interrupt
Rambling words bathe my head
You always did manage to disrupt

I liked how you confused me
Didn't I know how it would end?
Only, when with you, I forgot
Now our hearts will just have to mend

Only, I still don't want
To lose you, you know
Put each other through a ridiculous amount
Ridiculous . . . I have to let you go

And I want to apologize -
You tend to take all the blame
Though I'm just as at fault -
Hope is a two player game

And I forgive you for it all -
Tainted love and varying conviction
We knew we'd never work -
Although your hope was my favorite fiction

You and I were but a dream, and now we must wake to valediction

See You Soon

All the canceled plans
Shall pile to the moon
All the catch-you-later's
And every see-you-soon

And I'll regret not trying sooner
Not telling you when I thought -
"Wouldn't it be nice to see them?"
Because now I simply cannot

And that's a bit sad
To have the option snatched away
Though I may have never chosen it -
I'd save it for a rainy day

But it's raining now
And I miss you, you know
I've never been one to crave
Solitude or snow

And it's cold, all alone
And the rain will crystallize
And cover the ground
And fill the skies


And all the things left unsaid
Shall pile to the sun
All the bitten tongues
Shall turn to ash, one by one

And I'll regret not speaking sooner
Not saying what I thought
Not telling you the truth
Because now I simply cannot

And that's a bit sad
To have the ability snatched away
Though I may have never used it
To show my heart with the words I say

But it's snowing now . . .
And I love you, you know
I've never been one to profess it
Always trying not to let the feelings show

But it's cold without you
And all my thoughts of you crystallize
And invade my heart
And fill my eyes


And all the heartfelt smiles
Shall pile to the moon
And connect us for eternity
I hope . . . I'll see you soon